music, poetry and jokes

On Wednesday night, I took my first run at combining poetry, music and comedy at the Arts Club's Backstage lounge. It held together well, and the audience relly liked it. So my pursuit of expanding my expressions, and my show, is starting to pay dividends. It is rmearkable for me how soon things have come around, spending my time on this instead of the drunken pointlessness of the stand-up community.

I was too late to get a song in at Yew York last night, but just watching Tea and Mike do their songs gives me ideas about what I can do up there and what new songs I can write.

I had a non-confrontational coffee with my brother. He's going to Ethiopia to get married and live, so it was good to meet with him before he left, put some old anger/anxiety to bed.

I have been working at a friends on some home repairs for her, and so I will be back at that for a few hours today, after I get a coffee or two in me. then the show tongith at the CopperTank. So, loyal readers, gotta go, but have yourselves a great weekend.

EMDR

Have been working with my shrink with a protocol called EMDR (eye movement desensitizing reprocessing) and have found it to be very useful. Basically it is a way too process feelings and trauma's without talking about them. (Talking about sad things tends to make people sad, and takes a long time to get anywhere)By alternately stimulating both sides of the brain, it allows you to observe images and feelings ina way that doesn't add to the trauma. Like a dream state that gets you through stuff in the way that the brain recalls them, through images. This has been around for about twenty years, and has proved very successful in helping adults who have suffered abuse as a child to process it, and move toward a full recovery. Already I have been able to stop drinking and other substances as a way to kill pain, and I am feeling a lot clearer and am getting things done. If I can gain a healthly mental outlook through this, and my music and my time off from stand up, then this summer will have been the break through I have been looking for. I am looking forward to my two month tour out east, and have a lot of confidence in myself, as an artist and a person. I owe this, in no small part to my therapist, and myself - for not giving up on me.

Meanwhile I have a voice audition tomorrow, and a music lesson, then working on my friends house reno's, meeting with my brother for the first time this year, then doing a show at the arts club, doing comedy, poetry and music. Looks to be a full day, and so loyal readers, I think I'll hit the sack, and do some dreaming, and actually remember some of them, which hasn't happened in years.

must write more.

whenever i slack off from blogging, i forget how many readers i have. so here we go. drove all night last night. off to do a spot at the coppertank tonight. went with a friend to wtach and photgragh her in a triathalon. Without my own camara, the pictures didn't work out to well, as my friend was quick to point out. Perhaps my skills in photgraphy were the camara's and not me. My buddy Stephan has some work for me tomorrow and for a few days a week doing demolition, so this will help get some bills paid for before I leave for TO and the Maritimes in September. Poetry and Music have been going well and I am really enjoying doing it. My buddy Twitchy Rich is a big fan of poetry, and thinks I should write one about the "Four Poets of the Apocalypse". So I'll try.

I have been haunted a bit by thoughts of my ex, including wondering if she has thoughts of me. I know what she tells people about me, as was clearly outline by the blowhard jack-ass that did his "poem" challenging me to a fight, but i sometimes wonder what she thinks when she remembers what really happened. Time will make these thoughts fade, and I must say I'm feeling better all the time.

My shrink asked me to contact my mother to ask about her pregnancy with me, and so this has given my brother the need/excuse to contact me to have coffee with him. My shrink said it would be okay if parameters were set with what was to be talked about. My brother is no doubt looking for information to feed the family gossip mill, as well as "facts" to control my movements in regards to my family. He is in need of maintaining the belief that my estrangement from my family is his punishment of me, as opposed to my choice to no longer be their punching bag. Family are highly over rated things.