Attacked at the Well

AS I write this I have cuts on both hands, a bruised and scraped knee, a bruised shoulder and a lump behind my ear. It was a usual night at the Well. I was promised a set and then go bumped. JB hosting, so I didn't mind. At the end of the night I go outside to have a smoke and some Edmonton Kid named Ronnie came out, and we were talking about him doing a set at Darby's when all of a sudden these too guys come out of the club and look at Ronnie and say, are you a faggot. Then they look at me and say "Are You A Faggot?" I said, "No I'm a comedian". They start to grab at me so I peel off and they go at Ronnie. One of them slipped and fell, and Ronnie feel on top, so the other runs over and kicks him in the head. Before he can do that again, I rush over and push him off. Then they both jump me, one punching the back of my head. Finally enough of a ruckus is created that people come out of the club, and start milling around. I am pointing out the guys that jumped us and JB yells at me to shut up, blaming me for the fight. meanwhile another guy, no sure if he was from the group that jumped me, starts going at me. I told him to leave me alone. he keeps after me saying "you wanna fight". I look at him, he's a First Nations Person with and evil glare in his eyes. He grabs me by the jacket, and I spin out of my coat and away. He takes my coat and runs away. This jacket was my father's given to me after he passed away in March. It was a very nice black leather bomber. In the pocket were my car and apartment keys, my phone, my pot and my smokes. JB though this was hilarious, running over Sammy the Weasel, going, "Hey Sammy he lost is coat and his phone - isn't that great!"

The police come, and do what police do - nothing. "Sorry sir, but its gonna hard to identify a native with a stolen coat." (I guess they are very common!) So they asked what they would like me to do. I said "What's the code for 'Fuck it'?" "They said, "10-8". I said - okay 10-8 then. Then I walked back to my place, buzzed the building manager and came home - to sleep on the couch. Life is Good, isn't it. Here's comes Thanksgiving.