fuckin cancer

well, i'm not looking forward to it, but tomorrow morning i have surgery to get rid of my cancerous testicle. Nasty, I know, but what can you do. I really don't have a ton of info about whats going on with my body, so tomorrow will be a big step to finding out. tests have shown that I will require further treatment after this, ie Chemo, and maybe radiation. This sucks. All I can do at this point is take it one step at a time. So tomorrow will be a big step to get rid of these mother fucking renegade cells that are trying to kill me. Meanwhile, the left one wasn't my favourite anyway, especially now. Pisses me off. I'm sure there will be lots of jokes out of this. So far the best jokes have been from MO, who said I won't be losing much and Reid, who pointed out that soon the right one with be the "left"
one. Gotta find the humour in it, and as body parts go, its a pretty funny one.

The upside is, I really have a lot of good friends. I asked my friend Kim to take me through this tomorrow, and have got lots of calls of well wishes and good luck, and so its nice to be loved. Kerem bought a bunch of healthly food for me, (dried apricots, almonds and such.

This gives you a real perspective, facing your own mortality and all, cause a few weeks ago, life seemed kinda pointless. Suffice it to say, I am more focussed now.

Whatever this is, its gonna be a tough fight, but winning is the only option.